The Walk Away

as the old saying goes, you can’t make everybody happy. of course the intent is to be a built-in excuse for our shortcomings and those of our species. to make us feel better about all the people we’ve pissed off. but when you’re running a business that is so entirely dependent upon your reputation, it takes on a whole new meaning. 

a couple of weeks ago, i reached out to a potential client who had posted a need for a portrait photographer. as we exchanged messages, i felt the client trying to expand the scope of the job. i’m eager to please, and really looking to keep my calendar booked, so i looked past this. then, the client became argumentative. it would have been easy to throw down and defend myself, but i chose not to engage and to keep all of my communication positive. i could feel that this person was looking for me to fight back, but as with most people who are looking for a fight, when they don’t get it, they’ll get bored and walk away. in this case, that held true. the client said they’ll find another photog, and i wished them success. 

then, a few days ago, i got another message. the individual said that they changed their mind and they’d like to work with me over the weekend. i had no bookings this weekend so i was open to it, if a bit hesitant. while we were talking, an old friend and i started talking and it turns out she is the booking manager for a studio in bushwick.   

i took this as an auspicious sign. maybe this photo shoot would work out after all. but then the asks started coming in. do you have connections? can you help me get into modeling? i wanted to help. i thought for a minute, what if this is an opportunity? i’m a solid writer. i’m a good photog, and i know how to talk to people. but then reality struck. as i was spiraling down this path of possibility, my wife snapped me out of it.  thank the universe for that.  

i’m not an agent. i’m not trying to become an agent. and as much as i do want to break into the fashion industry as a resource for my photography, working with an emotion-driven and over-reaching potential client is not the way to do it. 

in retrospect, even though i mourn the lost opportunity to work on some new techniques and hone my craft, i still view this as a net positive. because i have already set my goals and it’s not up to my clients or anyone else to set them for me.